Day 7: Friday June 10th

Today Is the day we leave for Italy!

First we packed up from our little cottage in Normandy and headed back to Cergy to Kody's apartment. He had left his phone charger at his dorm and we decided we might need it just in case we get another flat. No big deal. So we drove there, snatched it up and then headed to the McDonalds down the road for breakfast.

But again you would think it would be easy enough to just grab breakfast and go right? Well we pulled into the parking lot and they had 3/4 of it blocked off for reserved parking(??? reserved for what!?)..so we drove around the thing like 3 times only to find they had 5 customer spots and the rest were employee spots. But of course they were ALL full. Then we started looking inside to see if anyone was there and to see if they were open. I saw some people so I walked up the door to go in but it was locked. I just don't understand what kind of restaurant gives customers only 5 spots and then locks them out…do they not want us to buy anything?? So my dad and family still are driving around looking for a spot when I walk around and finally find a door unlocked. So I motion to them and we finally get inside and try and communicate with the lady that we want our food. For a fast food chain, McDonalds in Paris likes to take their sweet time.

Finally we got on the road back to the airport. My dad really wanted to switch back to our old car so he called from Normandy and told them we would be by today to pick up a "Eco Opel" which was the first car we had. They said no problem and they would hold one for us. So we go to the garage..ask them..they send us back to the front desk…we go to the front desk..they send us back to the garage…they show us the car..it's not a diesel and it doesn't have Gertrude…so they show us another car..which is smaller…So we pick the Opel without diesel…We wanted diesel because gas is cheaper but my dad didn't even think to mention that on the phone

You have to imagine this scene. So it's in a parking garage and the Opel that we want is on the top floor and this other smaller car is on the bottom floor. So we have our little luggage cart with all our bags on it. I got in the Opel and said let's go downstairs to see the other one…so we take all our luggage down there…then we decide that we don't want that car..so dad goes to tell the lady that we want the Opel. So My brother and I start lugging our cart up the ramp when we see a car just get done cleaning and get parked. I tell Kody to go check it out and see if it's a diesel (we really wanted our old car!) So he leaves me to fend for myself with the luggage and then goes to check out the car. So we unload all our luggage and put it into the Opel. Kody comes up and says he couldn't tell what it is. I REALLY wanted Gertrude back so I say..should I go check and see..they decide I should. So I walk downstairs and go check it out. Guess what!! It was exactly like our first car except black. Even the license plate was similar. So next I BOOK it up the stairs and go panting to my mom that it's and Opel diesel. Kody and her yell at me to go tell dad. So I go running into the office and say "dad wait!" He was just about to sign for the Opel without diesel. I say "Dad *breath* there is *breath* and Opel Diesel *pant* downstairs *breath* with Gertrude and everything * breath* just like our old one! *pant*

2 weeks off of soccer, living on croissants and baguettes really gets a girl outta shape.

So he's like "what..I can't understand you" and then to the lady "hold on..just wait..I think we want ANOTHER car" So the lady is clearly like "VHAT! STUPIDE AMERICAN" So I explain again to by dad..this time in more complete sentences and then he tells the lady we want the car downstairs. But the lady doesn't understand so I'm like here…I'll show you. So we start walking out downstairs and she's like "What is wrong vith ze car I gave you?" So I calmly tried to explain that there was nothing wrong with the car except that we want the diesel and it just became available. I finally convinced her to follow me after a few more angry question about why we need to switch AGAIN. So I showed her it and said we wanted it and she is like "You vant me to switch ze contract again?" We promised her it would be the 4th and final time and continued to say thank you and she just replied "you are welcome" once and then said something else we couldn't understand under her breath. So eventually we got the right car and left. We were off to Italia! After 2 hours in the car place.

On the way we stopped at THE sketchiest bathroom ever. The women's toilet looked like a shower. There was no seat and it just had a sortve stall and a drain. We eventually braved them and saw you had a handle and you had to squat. Weirdest experience ever. I would also like to tell you that as we travel the country, the toilets have just gotten weirder and weirder. I wish I had taken pictures of all of them. I would have an album of crazy toilets that Americans don't know how to use. In France they have these toilets on the side of the street. They look like oval shaped port-o-potties. They are completely gray on the outside and could by mistaken for a vendor who closed up shop and on the inside is all the merchandise. But this is how they work.

You look on the outside and make sure the green unoccupied sign is on. If it's not, it's a red light and the directions say they are allowed to be in there for 20 minutes before it opens the door and kicks you out. So you could be waiting awhile. If you are lucky enough to get in, you do your business while this lady on the speaker is speaking directions to you in French. So if you speak another language you have no idea what to do. After you are done…there is no flush. So after looking for awhile you give up and decide to have a go at the sink. At the sink you stand there waving you hands trying to get the magical sink to work. If you were French this would be a piece of cake because all the directions are in French. Finally you decipher enough of the pictures to see that you wave your hand in a certain spot and soap and water will come out. Then you must shake dry your hands and attempt to open the bathroom door. After you get out (you still haven't flushed) make sure you warn the next person not to go in yet…because…it gives itself a shower after ever use. The door stays open for like 40 seconds and then it closes and the light switches to wash cycle. It flushes the toilet and washes everything including the floor. So finally the light switches to green and the next person can go. So with my family, going to the bathroom was a 40 minute ordeal. I would hate to be the unlucky person that just walks right in after someone and gets stuck in the washing cycle. I'm pretty sure the directions on the speaker were probably telling us to make sure we didn't get stuck in it..but once again..you wouldn't know if you can't understand them. We saved a few people from getting that fate. So now we understand why it takes a person 20 minutes to use the toilet..if you can't figure out how to use it, it takes forever.

Yes, I know, I just spent an entire paragraph talking about toilets. Toilets are a big ordeal for tourist. You can rarely find one..and when you do it cost money to use it..and then when you get inside it's this crazy contraption that looks like it should be a shower or a pandas play house.

While waiting to use one of these egg toilets, my father and I decided the reason it REALLY takes that long is because it's actually the portal to get to the Ministry of Magic. Tiny spoiler if you haven't seen Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1. But they currently use toilets to flush themselves into the Ministry. So I'd like to say I've found the toilets that take you there.:)

Super legit Metro poster

Eventually we came to a halt on the border of Italia. Apparently in order to get into Italy you must take and 8 mile tunnel to get there. But only a certain amount of cars can be in the tunnel at one time. So you spend 20 minutes waiting outside the tunnel before they check your ID and let you in. I passed out 1/2 way in trying to hold my breath.

Jokes. I only made it like 33 seconds.

Finally we made it home. At like 12 midnight. The lady that owned the Florence apartment was just AMAZED that we had driven all the way in one day. It's like a 14 hour drive and she was flabbergasted. For Mallory Family Airlines..that type of drive is a piece of cake. Easy. The apartment had a great view of Florence and was really nice and the lady spoke GREAT English. So far Florence is my favorite place. She even left us a bottle of wine. So of course my parents popped it open. The joke of the night was that my mom had barely eaten anything all day and then she got 1/2 a glass of wine and she was a little more than tipsy.

So that was our trip from France to Italy. Complete with a glass of vino (wine) to end the long day.

Firenze apartment

Trying to open the win bottle

Still trying

Success